"How can we use each other's differences in our common battle for a livable future? All of our children are prey. How do we raise them not to prey upon themselves and each other? And this is why we cannot be silent, because our silences will come to testify against us out of the mouths of our children."
Audre Lorde
I pulled this quote as a writing prompt from an essay I read on one of my favourite blogs. Lorde's words really resonated with me as an Island woman concerned for the welfare of my birth land and as a mother of three young people growing up in an era of widespread sensationalized pain and destruction. As a middle aged woman with a near desperate need to be close to the Earth I fail to see any separation between caring for my own children and caring for the Earth. If I fail to teach my children how to meet their needs in a manner which is respectful of Earth, I too fail Earth and likewise, if I succeed in raising children who see Earth as their mother, and themselves as shining pieces of that beautiful whole, I will have done well by both my children and Earth. I see no separation. So then, how can we raise children to not fall prey, as Lorde writes, to the ills of the world in which we live? How can we ourselves push forward when so much of what we hear each day hammers down the fear and uncertainty of modern times? And why is it so important that women must make their voices heard as caretakers, healers, intuits and empaths?
"because our silences will come to testify against us out of the mouths of our children."
I believe Lorde's words to be true. That our silence will only serve to allow the ways of corruption to continue. We must endure, but not the sort of endurance which destroys much in servitude of an egoist, power hungry self— we are living fifty shades of that already. Rather we must bear witness to our present societal sufferings in order to begin to restore a sense of dignity to all things.
But how? How do we restore a sense of dignity to something which seemingly requires so much effort in what seems like so little time? By bearing witness and sharing our stories of the persecution and oppression of all the children of Earth we remind each other of the natural dignity inherent in all.
This is how we heal. This is why we pay attention. The birthright of Earth, of all creatures and energies, of trees and flowers, of breath and stone and waterways and sky-their birthright is the right to exist by their very existence. All things exist because they have come into existence through processes of creation in the shape of time and space.
Yet, until we ourselves escape from the cultish grip of the same old, same old in the service of a male dominant system wooing us with promises of wealth, image, security and comfort we will be cursed to perpetuate much of the same.
When we can untangle women and children from servitude of an oppressive patriarchal system which undermines the values of true caring and loving only then will true dignity be restored. And it cannot be restored through our attempting to restore it. The more we try to control the outcomes of life the more we make a mess of things. Rather, as with raising our children, we only need create the space for dignity to emerge; removing layers of expectation and comparison, by being truly present to what is. Through raising children with a sense of their own dignity and respect for the dignity of others we make space for greater equality.
Then we are moving in the direction of "Each for Equal", the 2020 International Women's Day theme.
Each for Equal.
The spaciousness we desire, that breath of fresh air, the new idea, the welcome change; it all exists already and lays in wait for the space to emerge, like the brightness of daffodils in springtime.
Each for Equal.
When we raise our voices to lay bare the truths of our existence those truths will speak for themselves. Perhaps that truth is that it is incredibly difficult to be an intelligent and caring female engineer trying to protect the environment and have your voice heard in a male dominated office of men mostly unwilling to train in awareness of unconscious bias. Young girls deserve to grow up and become whatever they want to be and be treated with fairness and respect. Young boys do too but it is already easier for young boys to have this right.
We know well that there is much room for improvement. What then, might an Each for Equal birthright of dignity look like for our children? For Earth? The right to a meaningful existence.
To have needs met in a manner which respects both child and Earth alike.
The freedom to play, explore, to wonder and to be extraordinary.
The right and freedom to exist and not be exploited for profit or gain. But in the absence of this the world is filled with tears, confusion, hunger, fear, rage, pollution and destruction. And so much of this is due to our collective apathy and silence and an utter lack of willingness of too many men to truly respect the dignity of women and children and Earth. And so we must speak. Women of the world must speak.
Each for Equal.
Hugging trees and holding children, caring for the ill and aged, singing, dancing, growing food, holding hands of lovers, making peace with soil and waters and lighting fires with words.
Women must speak.
To be silent is to resist our own truths. It is a lie and it hurts the whole world as much as it hurts ourselves.
It is time to release our children and ourselves from expectations, and image and from the exploitation of industry and from the patriarchal perpetuation of more of the same.
Let us all be courageous enough to be our truest selves and before we know it we will have a whole world of children growing up to actually know and like themselves and to live their passions as their lives. Inevitably, these children will grow up not to serve themselves but they will have unwittingly, beautifully become that puzzle piece, the change, the critical difference, the bright light the world's been longing for and their lives will represent the truth of dignity and equality for all.
Happy International Women's Day 2020!
Be the change you seek and speak your truth. The world needs your voice!
In Peace and Hope and Love,
Jill M. MacCormack
* This essay was modified from my original 2018 blog post Women of the World Must Speak and previously published in RED magazine issue #19, spring 2019
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